Focus!

Each and every one of us faces difficult or stressful situations everyday. Naturally, some of the challenges life has in its stock for us are more important than others, which is why we need to do all that we can to be up to them.

Unfortunately, sometimes we fail which is something that happened to me yesterday. To cut a long story short, I failed my driving license test. Again. Needless to say, I felt horrible. Especially that I failed because of a stupid mistake I had never previously done and thought I would never commit. I reckon I just felt too confident. Oh well.

The reason I'm writing about it though is that as much as this situation sucks, I strongly believe I can learn from it. Let me explain.

I have had two driving exams so far, both of which I failed. The first time I did that I remember having been sitting in the waiting area all stressed and unable to formulate a single rational thought. I made a stupid mistake when driving in the city and I failed as I was coming back to the driving examination office (gutted).The second time I did it, that is yesterday, I decided to go out of the waiting area where the atmosphere among the people waiting for their exam was as if they were attending a funeral and move to the smoking area when people were laughing and talking with each other. As I smoked my cigarette I talked with lots of people, exchanging experiences with driving exams and agreeing on how horrible Polish regulations regarding that are. When I now think about it, I basically chilled out. The atmosphere was really relaxing which at the time I though was good. When someone called for me, I went to have my exam. I showed all the parts of the car I was told to, I sat in the car and the first thing I did was commiting a mistake I had never committed before. My leg was shaking so badly on the clutch that I couldn't control it. Fucking hell.

If I couldn't possibly find anything good in it though, it would probably undermine all that I believe in and I would disappear in the puff of logic. Thus what I think I learnt from that is that each and every person needs to focus before an important examination or event in their lifes, only that different people do it in various way. I reckon I now know how to do it myself to maximise my efficiency and not be subject to stress that's destroying chances for success. I cannot just give in to the stress that's trying to penetrate every single cell in my body, but in the same time I cannot just not think about it and chill out. I definitely need time before the important event in question. I need time for myself, when I can go through all that I need to know, I need to focus on what I am about to do. Otherwise I'll just end up finally getting that one chance to prove that I possess a certain skill and due to not having given it a thought before the stress will fall on me and prevent me from doing anything. If that makes sense. 

I'll keep that in mind the next time I'm doing an examination of any kind. For now I have long hours of waiting in a queue to sign up for another driving test and a whole month or two to wait for it. All I feel like repeating now is: Fucking hell. I hate Polish driving examination offices. 

On a brighter note, Easter is around the corner! April is truly a month of exciting things to look forward to! Including Look and Beuty&Vision international Forum in Poznań. Additionally, I managed to sew an XVIII century style cowl to my skirt AND make a t-shirt with my cross stitched work on it!

I hope you're having a lovely and exciting day :) xx

We'll see how it goes. 

By the way, this one's for you, you troublesome driving license!
One way or another, I'm gonna get you!